yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
And then he peed in my hair
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