so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
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