While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
