Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
