Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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