I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I'm too high and old for this...
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Randomize
