Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Randomize
