Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
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