My room smells like vodka and shame
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
Randomize
