naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Randomize
