If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
