Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
We need to get me chipped asap
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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