I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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