I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
