Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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