We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
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