You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
