did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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