Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
