Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
He better not be in your backpack
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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