im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
