Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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