so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
