Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize