Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Randomize
