We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
