I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
honey bunches of taint.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Randomize
