I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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