I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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