Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
