lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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