his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
