I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
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