omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Randomize
