he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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