I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Randomize
