Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
you made out with another girl for some wings
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
