Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
