): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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