I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
we're chasing vodka with high fives
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Randomize
