I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
