"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
