i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
