allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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