i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
