I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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