I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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