These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Randomize
