Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Randomize
