Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
